The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant: Forgiven but not Free
Matthew 18.21-35 Then Peter came and said to him, “Lord, if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times. For this reason the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his slaves. When he began the reckoning, one who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him; and, as he could not pay, his lord ordered him to be sold, together with his wife and children and all his possessions, and payment to be made. So the slave fell on his knees before him, saying, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.’ And out of pity for him, the lord of that slave released him and forgave him the debt. But that same slave, as he went out, came upon one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred denarii; and seizing him by the throat, he said, ‘Pay what you owe.’ Then his fellow slave fell down and pleaded with him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you.’ But he refused; then he went and threw him into prison until he would pay the debt. When his fellow slaves saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their lord all that had taken place. Then his lord summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. Should you not have had mercy on your fellow slave, as I had mercy on you?’ And in anger his lord handed him over to be tortured until he would pay his entire debt. So my heavenly Father will also do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
This is another one of those parables that always made me cringe when I hear it...
Jesus and the disciples had been having a conversation about forgiveness. Jesus has just gone through some scenarios with them about working toward reconciliation but as usual, the language is cryptic and the disciples trade glances with one another, trying to discern if anyone in the room has a grip on what Jesus is saying… but for Peter, it becomes too much… and he wants clarification.
So when Jesus finally stops talking long enough for him to squeeze a word in, Peter clears his throat and asks the question- “So… Jesus… just for those in the room who may not understand… what are you saying? Where do you draw the line on this stuff? How many times am I supposed to forgive someone in the church who sins against me? What... like 7 times?”
And that’s as much as he can get out before Jesus interrupts… "No Peter… not seven times… seventy seven times…
And before Peter can reply, Jesus says, “Let me tell you a story.. the Kingdom of heaven is like… "
or in our language...
"Here’s the way we are supposed to treat one another…"
And Jesus begins to tell a parable:
"A king decides to catch up with all the people who owe him money. And he starts with a guy who is in so far over his head, that he will never be able to pay the king back. The king orders the man thrown into prison with his wife and kids; and everything he has is sold... but the man pleads: ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything I owe you!’
And out of pity for him, the lord of that slave released him and forgave him the debt. Canceled…"
This is a huge act of forgiveness! The king knew that the man would never be able to repay what he owed, yet he just erased the debt. Any of us who have ever been in debt, whether to credit cards or utility companies, or even to another person, can somewhat relate to the stress the man was feeling when he tried to work out payment arrangements with his creditor. Imagine how it must have felt to have that debt dropped… to not owe anything anymore… to have a clean slate.
And Jesus goes on: "So, the forgiven man, with his clean slate- goes and finds someone to take it out on... He finds a guy who owes him a couple of dollars, 'seizes him by the throat' and has him tossed in jail for non payment."
Now, you would think that just having received forgiveness for his millions of dollars debt, he would easily be able to do that for someone else, especially for someone owing him only a couple of coins. But instead of feeling freed, receiving radical forgiveness had made him feel powerless- helpless about his inability to handle his finances. Obviously he had not been the best money manager, and probably in the past he had let lots of little things fall through the cracks- so now in seizing the throat of his fellow slave, he is attempting to seize control of his life, get back his money, exact control over himself so he doesn’t have to be put in that position with the king (master) again… Instead of celebrating his get out of jail free card, he imprisoned himself in self loathing and anger…so when the poor schlock who owed him a couple of bucks couldn’t pay it back, the cries for mercy fell on deaf ears. And he ends up punishing instead of forgiving…
But why? Sometimes when we receive radical forgiveness, our first reaction as (somewhat jaded) human beings, after our initial relief, is to question... "Why? What does that person want from me? No one does something for nothing… where are the strings? No strings? What does that mean? Now that he has forgiven me, does that mean I owe him my gratitude? Do I owe him favors? Do I have to keep saying thank you every time I see him? How do I have a relationship with this person now that he has done this great thing for me and I feel so bad about myself because I got myself into this in the first place? I couldn’t fix it myself and someone, who is more powerful than me, had to step in to save me from my self."
Sometimes we can feel like that with God… and I believe that is, in large part, what keeps us from enjoying a relationship with God. We profess that God forgives us, unconditionally- no strings attached! But frankly that idea is too hard to wrap our heads around! So we add our own strings... after all, it was our own screw ups that caused God to step in and forgive in the first place… we are the ones continually falling short, we are the ones continually racking up debt, we are the ones continually in need of help… and it seems that we are powerless to do anything about any of it ourselves. Then God steps in with unbridled forgiveness, every time- Every Time...EVERY TIME! And God says… "Look, there’s no debt between us… come hang with me… enjoy me- delight yourself in me and I will give you the desires of your heart! (Ps 37:4)" But we can't enjoy it! "I don't like having to be forgiven- I like being in control! I don't want to be in need of anyone's mercy- it's easier to not mess up! In fact, starting today I'm taking stock of myself- I'm getting my life and my behavior together- seizing it by the throat, if you will. No more being helpless begging before the almighty!" And so with a microscope on my own behavior, it becomes very easy to judge others shortcomings as well. It simple to act just like the servant in the story in the way I treat them.
So go back to the scripture- the Master finds out about the servant's behavior... And in anger his lord handed him over to be tortured until he would pay his entire debt.
Well, that’s justice! And if I were into God being a just God, who gives people what they deserve in the end, then I could be comfortable with this ending...
But, there are 2 things we should talk about before we decide what this passage means… 1. Handed him over to be tortured- is the same Greek word that Paul uses in Romans- handing over means letting people live out the consequences of their actions- in other words- when we don’t forgive, or if we forgive with strings attached, we imprison ourselves; we set ourselves up for a torturous life… but it's our doing- God wants more for us, but God will let us live out the life we choose… … and here’s where we are going to take a major turn... because traditionally, we look at this parable and interpret the master as God, and us as the one who had received forgiveness, and that when we don’t forgive like God forgives, then God calls us out on it on judgment day and we are of course, handed over to be tortured… and Jesus even says, in the next line… so your heavenly father will do to you if you don’t forgive your brother or sister from your heart. And that's great- except I know God to be a God who gives me what I don’t deserve- I know God to be a God of grace- who doles our forgiveness in heaps with no strings attached- with no expectations, with no conditions… forgiveness given before we even knew to ask for it. So to make God, in the end, the unforgiving King, doesn't make sense... (remember my favorite quote is, "It is a lie, any talk of God that does not comfort you." Miester Ekhart)
So what if this parable is not about God’s forgiveness to us- but our forgiveness toward each other?
Remember Jesus said at the beginning of the parable, the Kingdom of heaven is like…or, "this is the way you are supposed to treat each other" Perhaps the master in the story is us. This makes more sense… because sometimes I feel very much like the master. When there is some hurt between me and another person, and I am willing to forgive… and it feels so good to let it go. However, if I am honest, when that person leaves my sight, I expect them to act in a certain way- or fulfill certain expectations because of my good will toward them. And I don’t like it when they don't do the same for others....
Because in reality, I haven't forgiven that person- I've invested in that person... and sometimes that means I want to control that person... I think that person I've invested in should act, well, if not indebted, at least changed by my generosity of spirit… and when they aren’t, I act just like the master, I revoke my forgiveness- I pull back my resources, and keep my forgiveness and my money in my pocket next time… next time I’m not going to be ripped off, next time I won’t be so quick to forgive…
But that’s not forgiveness from the heart- and it's not Godly forgiveness. Godly forgiveness comes with no strings, no expectations…
Yet- we're still left with "so your heavenly father will do to you if you do not forgive one another." Simply put "You will live a tortured life if you don't learn to forgive one another unconditionally." So its not like "You will suffer by God throwing you in hell if you don't get this stuff right." It's "why would you want to live out your life not really basking in the joy of God's forgiveness?" And yeah- that's easier said than done- seeing ourselves as not only forgiven, but acceptable- but it's through that joy, that we can truly forgive each other, and start to experience the Kingdom of Heaven..